| | 2008 Holiday Parties: Yahoo! Intuit! Home! NYE!
No December is complete without the over-the-top corporate holiday party and this year was no exception. Sorry, but "hard economic times"? Really??
Yahoo!
The theme was Vegas! It was corporate's subtle way of letting us know that working for Yahoo! these days can be a real gamble. Which is fine - but please don't make me work with that Microsoft paperclip guy! He is so smug!
My girls! We are 50% blonde and 50% blackheads. Wait a minute...let me zoom in on some of those roots...
It wasn't before too long when I spotted my manager double fisting the drinks. I encourage more drinkie to get more money. Fail.
In the Luxor pyramid, we pose by what I thought was a cement piñata. I hacked at it and it crumbled revealing nothing interesting. Just rubble and tootsie rolls.
Kara and her date Ankhur. They have the same smile which leads me to suspect they might be siblings.
Danna and Harshal temporarily abandon their dates to take a photo that screams hotness. Their dates later take revenge by abandoning them and taking a photo that screams coldness. It is too cold to post.
My date and I got married! Prop 8 say whaaatttt??!!
Stacy and Danna found some Vegas-y people. I cannot identify them but one of them has eyebrows that inspire me to play pinball.
I find more trustworthy eyebrows on my friends from PayPal! I hung out with them for 5 minutes and walk away with a premium PayPal account. Suckered!
Kathryn proves that a royal flush can be classier than an over-told joke about a queen taking a dump. (email me if you want to hear the joke).
After 3 shots of water, I am ready to par-tay!!! I probably should have asked where those beads have been...
Jeremy gives me an excuse to show off how awesome my shoes are. Zoom in to see the puss and blood oozing out of my blisters.
If I am not invited to join a group photo, I take my revenge by ruining the shot. Sorry bitches - you've unleashed my wrath.
Intuit
My friend Michael invited me to Intuit's party. Another elaborate event!
Michael was very sweet date and did not mock me for being underdressed. All the other women were wearing long gowns. And me? Inappropriate summer dress. I didn't get the memo. :(
I made friends! White ones!
Nicki plays at the casinos. Is someone nabbing her cash or simply tuning into Tokyo?
Always the last to leave to pilfer through the decorations. I went home with a vase and that sprawling staircase.
Home!
Sharon and I threw a Christmas party at your home! Despite the rain and the sicknesses going around, we got a great turnout. And what's a party without a trashy white elephant gift exchange? Certainly not ours!
Kara re-evaluates her belief in Santa. If he doesn't exist, how did she get exactly what she wanted?? A thick juicy cucumber?
Sharon gets a colossal remote control to which I politely ban from the house. It's just not the look we are going for.
Christine gets what I can only guess is a designer bong.
Sophia cannot contain her excitement as she nabs Magic Rocks from a crippled child.
Everyone plays with their new toys. Sophie is still enthralled with her new project and Kara disappears into the bathroom for 15 minutes.
I force people to listen to my guitar. Kathryn bellows out the tunes proudly.
But Dina singing takes the cake. As Rome struggles with the lyrics. Reading IS hard, Rome. Reading IS hard.
Our parties bring lovers together. Even if buffered by a hand condom.
David tries to shimmy Suzan and me towards the mistletoe for some triple play. However, at the last minute, he shoves me aside and plants a wet one on Suzan.
And I am alone. Chapped lips and all.
NYE!
For New Years Eve, a group of us went to Le Coloniel for dinner and dancing. Three of the girls had male dates. I was only able to wrangle a female date. But a hot one! Score!
Kathryn, Sharon and I start the evening out with some class. Nice smiles and sucked in bellies.
Ramon's new years resolution is to look women in the eyes when conversing. Who can blame him? Steph's got a sweet pair.
Sharon's date got her a corsage! So romantic! The other men shift uncomfortably and mumble their excuses while their dates gush in jealousy. Prom Queen!
The girls before we shake up the dance floor. Notice the lack of men in the photos. Why? Because girls rule boys drool!
Stacy, Sharon and I did not synchronize our posing. Stacy was doing her Zoolander. Sharon was doing her pageant smile. And I was doing underage Japanese girl.
With a little more alcohol in the systems, we learn a little more about the girls. While Kathryn maintains a calm demeanor, Steph and Stacy's belligerent sides emerge. A brawl starts shortly after. We were kicked out at 11:59. Rats!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year everyone! Hope you achieve your new years resolutions! See you at the gym, fatso!
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| | Posted 1/4/2009 3:17 AM - 440 Views - 18 eProps - 13 comments
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<-- that was me grabbing the rim of my eye glasses and pulling them down slightly while looking coquettish
